a eulogy for 80’s night

back in the early 2000’s, bill and i used to go to evolution on wednesdays for 80’s night. those were fantastic times. evolution was such a gross, cool dive of a club, full of goths, art students, and other social misfits. i couldn’t even begin to count the # of nights we stayed until closing, dancing like maniacs to flock of seagulls, billy idol, joy division, men without hats, the police, modern english, michael jackson, the cure, depeche mode, prince, gary numan, etc. sometimes girls would fall over each other for bill and join us (i never got any action there, despite my best efforts), sometimes we would bring some of our pals with us, but at the very least there was always me and bill: two straight dudes both well over 6 feet tall, dancing together like a gay couple and having the time of our lives doing it.

a few years later, i went a bunch more times with jenn and her pals. 80’s night wasn’t anywhere near as busy as it used to be but it was still a ton of fun.

then the atrocity known as 90’s night became the new thing, and just like that, 80’s night was gone.

i held out hope for several years that 90’s night was just a phase and that it would pass soon enough. i imagined the triumphant return of 80’s night, of reliving the old glories of the past. but it’s never come.

eventually, i realized that the reason 80’s night died is because most everyone who grew up in the 80’s and loved going to 80’s night in their early- to mid-20’s eventually finished college and landed jobs they had to wake up early for; got married and decided going to clubs wasn’t their thing anymore; had kids. it’s simple demographics. basically, they all moved on or got sedate and left me here alone, bathing in the ether of memories of stale beer smells, sticky dance floors, blinding strobe lights, and duran duran. i still haven’t had enough of it but i guess it’s better to end on a happy note than beat it to death and wind up sick of it.

i will always love 80’s night. here’s to evo and all the wonderful times that shit hole provided us.

note: i know this song isn’t 80’s but it’s by the poster boys of 80’s new wave and still retains their distinct, synth-heavy 80’s sound. plus it suits this post. PLUS IT’S MY BLOG AND I’LL DO WHAT I WANT HERE, DAD.

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