fuck ’30 seconds outdoor cleaner’ and every other bullshit easy clean method

i just saw a commercial for this shit.

it says it’s super easy, just spray it on algae, mold, whatever, and then rinse it off. so easy! and it’s biodegradable and environmentally friendly!

…just put the pets away when you use it, don’t use it near swimming pools, and don’t use it near drinking water. that’s according to their FAQ. but it’s still totally green.

horse shit.

i wanted to clean the siding on our house last year but didn’t want to use gallons of bleach-like chemicals like this 30 seconds shit. i did lots of searching online for tips but there were so many contradictory opinions — use bleach/don’t use bleach, use a power washer/don’t use a power washer, spray this crap on a let it sit for a day but only if it’s really sunny and hot out, etc — that in the end, i wound up hiring a guy that my in-laws recommended. he wound up being awesome. he was really informative, did it way faster than i could dream of doing it myself, charged way less than i imagined, and guess what he used.

nothing but water and a really long brush.

Washing balcony glass safely and effectively using 100% pure water is not only safe on the environment – it’s safe on your property, and our window cleaning professionals.” — fuck yeah.

he said there was no substitute for elbow grease. i fell in love with him instantly, obv.

so let walmart keep their toxic cleaners that make false claims about being 100% safe. if they can melt mold and algae in seconds, you can bet your ass you wouldn’t want to drink them. i’m getting that same guy to come clean our house again this year.

btw, the guy who cleaned our house was named chris and his company is called window viper. i highly recommend him.

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