dead dog

i just put our dog down. he was old and had been steadily declining for the last few months. he took a turn for the worse in the last few days and it was clear we had to put him out of his misery sooner than later.

he was mostly a terrible dog — getting into our neighbour’s trash, getting into OUR trash, running away, not listening, harassing the chickens, pissing on people (he did this numerous times, not sure why), etc. but despite all that, he was part border collie and thus very sensitive and affectionate, and i ultimately found it hard to hate the little bastard. i admit that i even had a a little boo hoo when the vet gave him the injection.

but i’m not sure what i was upset for. it makes sense to me to be upset when you see something suffering, and it also makes sense to be upset for your own personal loss if you think you’re going to miss that thing. but my dog was being mercifully euthanized because his life now sucked, and i honestly don’t think i’m going to miss him much — he really was a huge pain. so why did i cry when he died? am i suddenly a crier now? i don’t know.

RIP, dodge. you smelly, badly behaved, ugly rat of a dog. maybe i’ll miss your ugly face more than i think.


incognito at the river last summer


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