i don’t think i’m exaggerating when i say that 99% of all internet comments are stupid

i’ve bitched and moaned about dumbass comments on youtube videos and heavy metal news articles, believing that they were pinnacles of human stupidity. however, i’ve recently been bitterly disappointed to realize that the comments sections of numerous other websites are no different.

i frequent the mmafighting.com website to stay up to date on news in the MMA fighting world, and just like blabbermouth.net, each story has its own comment section which often garners hundreds of comments and numerous responses to those comments. some of those comments are fine and basically sensible but i’ve never seen one and thought “WOW, THAT’S A BRILLIANT AND TOTALLY ORIGINAL TAKE ON THIS THAT I NEVER CONSIDERED.” at best, i might think, “i basically agree with this.” but more often than not, it’s just twits stating that jon jones is the GOAT (‘greatest of all time,’ i recently learned), telling other commenters to suck their dick, telling other commenters that their mothers are whores, blah blah blah. i’ve learned there’s really no reason for me to bother scrolling down to see what the peanut gallery has to say because it’s never illuminating or interesting. moreover, i see the same half dozen names over and over — some basement dwellers are spending the majority of their days commenting on MMA news! don’t these slugs have jobs?

similarly, i read the news at cbc.ca which offers the same commenting opportunities on each story. i figured the average canadian interested in world affairs would have more thoughtful or interesting things to contribute than the youtube, blabbermouth, and mmafighting trolls, but nope. the comments section is just another forum for opinionated blowhards to tell everyone else that their opinions suck and that we’ll all be sorry real soon that we elected a liberal government because this country is about to go down the shitter, to which respondents reply with ‘eye roll’ emoticons and the like. it’s annoying enough to make me want to stab myself in the neck.

screen-shot-2013-01-14-at-10-33-26-jan-14

pretty tough to do from the back but totally worth it

so now i’m wondering if the type of people who love to publicly comment on stuff — be it heavy metal news, world events, lady gaga videos, or otherwise — are particularly loudmouthed dickheads like myself, or if they’re an accurate representation of the average dope. i hope it’s the former but i’m not holding my breath on that one.

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