jenn is watching a documentary on amy winehouse right now. i think it’s too detailed, too long and boring, but it did get me thinking about winehouse, and reading about her online.
somehow, i never realized what a huge star she was. back around 2010-ish, i heard back to black and rehab two or three times each and liked both. then someone showed me a pic of her stumbling around london drunk in her underwear, or something like that. that was all i ever heard about her, and then she was dead. at the time, i was like “huh. oh well.” i wasn’t nuts about her stuff but i did think she was massively, massively talented. she could sing like a mad bastard so effortlessly, and i appreciated her brutally raw, honest lyrics.
so i just looked her up on youtube now and holy shit, i must have had my head in the sand for the last 10 years — back to black and rehab both have well over 100,000,000 views, and you know i’m no good isn’t far behind at 87,000,000 views. i had no idea she was that popular.
but you know, it makes me sad that she was so huge. she battled a lot of shit — drug and alcohol addictions, eating disorders, dependence on loser drug addict boyfriends, shitty parents who were completely out to lunch while their daughter was derailing hard — and the whole world watched, thoroughly enrapt, as she self destructed. i would feel guilty if i had followed all that tabloid bullshit, eating up the crumbs of winehouse’s disintegrating life, all the while profiting the vultures in the media who were chomping at the bit to be the first to cover her eventual death.
it’s hard enough for people to struggle against addictions and shit. doing it publicly as a huge star can only make that struggle even harder. media who seek those struggling stars and their stories out, and the readers who buy the stories, should be fucking ashamed of themselves.
i feel terrible for winehouse. i wish she had had some privacy, good friends, and no record industry pressure so that she would have at least had a fighting chance to get herself together.