ice cream dinner

lots to talk about today.

i was just cleaning the kitchen while listening to what i believe is the latest aphex twin release, orphans. i like it. i put it on because it was recommended on youtube and i liked the artwork for it, and because i generally like richard d. james’ stuff. i don’t listen to electronic music much because i find most of it boring and derivative but when i do find something in the genre i like, i get pretty excited about it. it’s also usually summer when i get pumped on electronic stuff so i always associate it with summer, which i think is interesting. i should make a conscious effort to listen to it more in other seasons and see how that makes me feel.

so i’m listening to EDM on a summer day, cleaning the kitchen, feeling pretty good about summer 2017 so far. jenn and i have been taking the dogs swimming lots lately, at the quarry, the koksilah river, and various beaches at shawnigan. we’ve also done some great hikes around here in the last few weeks to some awesome, out of the way places that we’ve never seen before. after one of those hikes, we stopped at ice cream mountain and both got double scoop waffle cones. they were fantastic. we didn’t even eat any dinner after that because we were still too full. i felt terribly guilty about it. but then last night, we had a few friends over to watch trick r’ treat on the side of the house and guess what — i ended up eating nothing but ‘extreme cheddar’ old dutch crunchys. that’s two junk food dinners in a week. my god, i’ll be as big as a house in no time at this rate.

all signs of a decent summer.

other stuff: here is the artwork for that aphex twin record.


i really like it. it’s subtly weird. if i was a kid and saw this in my dad’s record collection, i would have been unsettled by it though i can’t explain why. so it makes me sad that digital music doesn’t allow us to hold physical pieces of visual art in our hands anymore and have those kinds of experiences. i mean, i have an old hawkwind album on vinyl, warrior on the edge of time, and not only are the covers of the record beautiful but the sleeve unfolds into a fucking warrior’s shield. it’s amazing. album artwork like that gives the aural presentation a whole other layer and opportunity to make an impression on the listener. i miss that.


the fantastical cover art on one side…


…a shield on the reverse!









i think that’s all i wanted to say right now. back to cleaning.



yesterday i saw a girl who was absolutely gorgeous. like, stunning.

afterward, i thought to myself, “i wonder if she’s as kind as she is beautiful.”

then i thought, “i wonder if she’s as interesting as she is beautiful.”

then i thought, “i wonder if she’s as smart as she is beautiful.”

then i thought, “i wonder if she’s as funny as she is beautiful.”

of course she couldn’t possibly be all those things — i’m sure she’d be extremely disappointing if i actually knew the poor girl — but that’s beside the point. what really hit me about this train of thought is that it’s weird that physical attraction is usually the first requirement we look at in potential mates. i mean, i obviously don’t doubt attraction is important, but there are so many other more important things to consider that it seems like it would be a real waste to write someone off over their looks if they aced all those other check boxes.

and i know from experience that it’s possible to learn to find people attractive. i’ve met people that i’ve had zero attraction to, who i have eventually found very attractive after i got to know them well.

and yet i don’t think i could ever convince myself to wholly ignore a potential mates appearance. i could try to justify this and say it’s in our DNA, that we’re programmed to want to fuck our partners in order to procreate, but i don’t think it’s that powerful or ingrained. i think when it comes down to it, we are all probably just surprisingly superficial. like how, given the choice, most of us would rather own a ferrari than a minivan. similarly, i think we’d rather have mates we like to look at, that other people might look at and covet. but vehicles and mates are totally different in that mates supply us with so much more than just transportation. they supply us with complex emotional needs, as well as myriad practical, day-to-day needs — needs that aren’t dependent upon appearances. so it’s odd we still place so much value on appearance. it’s shallow as all hell.

then again, it takes time to get to know someone and figure out if they meet all the various mate criteria, but looks are something we can observe immediately, so in that regard it makes sense that it’s the first test a potential mate must pass. or maybe i’m thinking about it in the wrong way. maybe it’s not that a mate has to pass the appearance test, maybe it’s deeper than just an intuitive urge to fuck that person. maybe it’s more that something in a potential mates appearance or body language indicates something deeper about them, something related to the other more substantial qualities a good mate must possess.

jesus christ, i’m talking myself in circles. i have no idea how i feel about this. it all probably varies from situation to situation anyway so i don’t even know why i’m bothering to give it this much thought. fuck it. i’ll watch windowlicker and have a laugh instead.