sh-it

so they’re remaking the film adaptation of stephen king’s it.

what for? does anyone think they’re going to outdo this?

dream on. tim curry was masterful in his portrayal of pennywise. look how he perfectly captures the clown vibe, that simultaneously goofy yet nightmarish quality that inspires fear in so many people. do you think anyone can pull that off? because they can’t. it takes a deep understanding of clowns, the circus, facial expressions, body language, children’s minds and imaginations, etc to create curry’s performance. a wig and some makeup do not a scary clown make.

i’m sure some hipster dickhead loser somewhere who LOVES remakes will read this and think, “this jerk isn’t even giving the remake a chance.” and of course, they’re correct. i’m not going to waste my time watching that trash. remakes are a lazy, cheap way to profit off of nostalgia. think of all the adults out there who grew up in the 80’s and loved the first version of this flick. most of them will see a trailer or ad for the remake and think “i liked that movie, i’d like to see it updated with some sweet CGI and scarlett johansson in the lead role.” bam, there’s its built-in audience. that’s all it takes. the remake doesn’t need to be good to be successful. it will be successful simply by bearing the same name and recognizable characters as the original. the rest is just details, details which will mauled and mutilated until the film becomes a humorous, insipid love triangle action movie.

mark my words: it will be garbage.

so no, i’m not going to be checking it out. i’m going to be avoiding it at all costs. i hope it dies on the cutting room floor.

fuck remakes and fuck the lazy cunts who keep pounding them out. get an original idea for once, you hacks. take a chance, do something real, say something that matters, do something that actually means something to you. or just go die. these remakes are utter shit and so are the people behind them.