Surprise! — yet another encounter with a Craigslist jackoff

Buckle up. Time for more of the same old bullshit.

Do you remember a post I made a few weeks ago about how I went to Victoria to do five errands, and I either failed or struggled to complete each of those errands? One of those errands was buying a vintage home stereo amp from a guy. He had an amp that he said worked great and had no problems. But when I showed up there, none of the lights on it worked. He acted like that wasn’t a big deal but I passed on it because I’m one of those crazy people who actually like the shit I buy to work. He showed me some other units he had for sale but I wasn’t interested in any of them so that was that.

That was weeks ago, maybe a month ago. Fast forward to today, when I found another vintage home stereo amp for sale on usedvictoria that I liked. It turned out to be the same seller so I was a little nervous — I didn’t want to make the drive down there again for another piece of shit that didn’t work. I specifically said to him, “if this unit all works properly, I’ll gladly come get it.” He said yup, it’s all good.

I showed up and got him to hook the unit for me. What do you know, the left channel was totally fucked. All that came out of the speaker on that side was a little ‘brap’ sound every now and then. Perplexed, he said, “it might be that speaker, hang on.” He switched it with another speaker — same problem. He admitted now that he hadn’t thoroughly tested it before, that he just hooked some speakers up and it made sound so he figured it was fine. “Well, huh huh, how embarrassing, that’s twice now for ya, jeez I feel bad about this…” He took the lid off of the unit and found one of the fuses on the circuit board was blown so he replaced it and tried again. It started fine but as soon as he adjusted the treble, a different fuse blew. Now both speakers only made the occasional ‘brap.’ At that point, I left, absolutely fucking furious with this loser, and with myself as well.

The essential details I’ve already recounted are bad enough obviously but there are many other little details that make it much more irritating, and I want to document them. Here they are.

  • The seller is a guy is in his late 50’s, short, pot-bellied, poor posture, and he has absolutely no ass to speak of. In fact, it looks like his ass is actually concave, sort of like his butt was amputated. Like this, but far worse.
no-butt

Do some fucking squats, for heaven’s sake.

  • The guy’s name is Rod. As in, ‘Hot Rod.’ That’s what I think of when I meet guys named Rod — 50-something yr old losers who retain their retarded elementary school nickname throughout their whole lives because they still think it sounds cool, 50-odd years later. This guy acts just like you’d expect a Rod to, too — old, lame, and sad but still somehow thinks he’s a badass cool dude.
  • He worked at a pawn shop for years and acted like this experience made him knowledgeable about all manners of consumer goods, like this makes him a connoisseur of all things. He’s in denial that people who work at pawn shops are white trash shit rats who are just trying to take advantage of the white trash shit rat customers.
  • With an air of great pride, he told me that he likes to fix all kinds of old stuff and keep it working indefinitely, like all the old stereos he was selling. But with the first stereo, he couldn’t fix the burnt out lights, and the second stereo, he didn’t even notice one speaker wasn’t working, and when he did notice it, he had a hell of a time just getting the cover off of the unit and said some things that made it apparent he actually had no idea what he was looking at, that burnt out fuses were the one and only thing he could fix. It became evident he doesn’t actually know how to fix old stuff, he just likes to buy cheap old stuff at thrift shops and jack the price up to resell it at a profit. What a benevolent, gracious human being, what an unsung hero.
  • Before we realized the second stereo was fucked yesterday, I asked him where he got these things from, because he had lots of them. In typical Rod fashion, he played it super cool and vaguely responded, “oh, you know, here and there. I come across so many, it’s hard to keep track.” But after 10 minutes of unsuccessful fucking around with the unit yesterday, he started talking more just to fill the uncomfortable silence and mentioned that he picked this unit up from a Bibles For Missions thrift store. Why would he not mention that to me in the first place, why be coy about it? Did he think I was going to start following him, picking over the same thrift stores as him and copying his ‘selling busted stereo equipment’ side business?
  • Another thing he mentioned to fill the uncomfortable silence while he fumbled with the stereo was that he had a full time job, and just did this on the side for fun and didn’t make much money off of it. He said this as if that was some sort of extenuating factor, like maybe I was expecting too much by wanting these stereos to actually work.
  • The first time I met Rod, he showed me his personal stereo, his pride and joy, and told me in his patented ‘cool guy’ voice how loud it got and how many house parties he used it at over the years and how you could hear the music clearly all the way down the street and how the cops came numerous times. Wow, that’s awesome, Rod.
  • Both the first time and this time when he was showing me the stereos, he played the same Tragically Hip song. I think it was Blow At High Dough. I fucking hate The Tragically Hip, and I hate that song. Shitty Canadian bar rock with a pretentious “I’m such an artist” twist. Garbage.
  • On that note, today while he was fucking around, I saw some terrible CDs lying around. There was a ‘Best of Classic Rock’ compilation (that was its actual name), Big Shiny Tunes 4, and a band or artist I can’t remember now but it was John Mellencamp or The Eagles or some equally bland radio rock. This detail seemed perfectly fitting to me — of course this lame old ex-pawn shop dude named Rod who looks somewhat like a prawn and sells garbage stereo stuff online would own a bunch of CDs in the year 2019 of terrible bands, and compilations of many terrible bands.

That’s my character sketch of Ron. I wish I had a photo of him to post here. Maybe I should go back there just to snap a pic for the blog. Nah, no point. I’m sure everyone who has ever been to a pawn shop can picture the little troll quite clearly now.

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more craigslist bullshit

bill and i always bitch at each other about how shitty it is to sell stuff online on craigslist or usedvictoria or whatever. sometimes you get lucky and manage to buy or sell stuff pretty easy but for the most part, people are fucking stupid assholes. i have even bitched about it on here a few times, like here and here. i just had a few lousy recent experiences to add to the pile.

#1. so i listed an old cell phone on usedcowichan.com and got an email about it that said, “hi can you text me?” i fucking HATE texting so that was a bad start. i texted back and forth about a million times with this twit about whether i was firm on the $35 price tag and when and where we could meet because she was in shawnigan right now but was going to mill bay in a little bit to get some dinner for her kids so maybe mill bay would work better and blah blah blah, FUCK. we honestly could have worked all of this out in a 2 minute phone conversation but apparently she only had texting on her phone so it took us a few days.

who has a fucking phone that you can’t talk on? jesus christ, what is this world coming to.

we finally hammered out a time and place to meet up. she bought the phone and then 5 minutes later she texts me again saying, “it’s locked.” so i go back out to meet her and sure as shit, it’s locked and i don’t remember the code. i was pretty frustrated but just gave her the money back and said i would let her know if i figured it out. then i had to remind her to also give me back the box and charger, the idiot. i got home, figured out the code out within an hour, and texted her to let her know. she got back to me and said she had spent the money on dinner for her kids and would be broke for the next 3 weeks, if i could wait that long.

how does someone only have $35 to live on for 3 weeks, how can they justify spending their last $35 on a cell phone, how can they not scrounge another $35 together in 3 weeks, and what are her kids supposed to be eating for dinner for the next 3 weeks if she just spent her last $35 on a single dinner for them now? so many stupid questions, so few answers. i didn’t bother responding at this point.

#2. a few days later, i get an email from the same girl’s email address but this time, she’s asking me to send a text to a different #. weird. anyway, i did, and i was obviously dealing with a different person because they responded much faster and used proper grammar, whereas the previous girl was slow and had terrible grammar. this person asked me how much the phone was. i said $35, they said “oh too bad, i only have $30.” i almost texted back “fuck you” but decided to just leave them hanging. within a few minutes, they texted again asking if i would take $30. i said nope, and that was that. fine by me, i’d rather hang on to the phone forever rather than buy some bullshit story from a cheap prick who insists on feeling like they’re getting a deal.

#3. i had some cedar mill ends sitting in the yard, making it look like a shithole. jenn and i had wanted to use them for campfires but we had way too many to fit in the bin so i put up an ad saying the stuff on the ground was free for the taking. i had several people email me right away but none of them got back to me after i responded to them. i guess free firewood was just too much hassle for them to follow through on.

finally some guy came to get them. he got most of them into his car and said he’d be back in the afternoon for the rest of them. i said great. afternoon came and went, and he texted me to ask if he could come the next morning for them. i said sure. the next morning came and went, no sign of the guy. several weeks came and went, no sign of the guy. finally after almost a month i got around to cleaning them up myself and managed to squeeze them all into the bin. just two days later and after weeks with no contact, i received a text from the guy who had picked up most of the wood, claiming he had had a family emergency prevent him from getting the rest of the mill ends. he asked if they were still there and could he come get them.

he obviously thinks i’m a fucking idiot. he bailed on me twice, then used the family emergency line because it’s a safe lie that no one is going to give you shit over. well, fuck him. i told him i had a family emergency and had to get rid of all that free wood shortly after he bailed on me. no, i didn’t say that, i just told him it was already gone.

#4. this isn’t quite a craigslist story but it’s close enough, and so similar to #3 that i have to mention it. i sold some tercel stickers to a guy on the 4wd tercel forum for a whopping $4. i mailed them promptly after he ordered them, but after several weeks i still had not received his payment. i sent him a polite private message through the forum, no response. i emailed him politely, no response. after 2 months i sent him an irate private message and email telling him i was pissed that he would order something he either couldn’t afford, or couldn’t be bothered to actually pay for. i said $4 is obviously not going to break me but it’s fucking low, shitty, and cheap as all hell to not pay such a miniscule debt, especially when i was so prompt and sent him his shit in good faith, and that i was going to ban him from the forum for being a shitty person. finally, after months, i got a response.

he said he had had a family emergency.

fuck every idiot and their “family emergencies.” i don’t buy them for a second. and you know what, even if you have a family emergency, i bet you could still have found time to throw four measly fucking dollars in an envelope and drop it in the mailbox on the way to the hospital, or send me a text in a timely manner saying “sorry, something came up, i can’t come pick up that wood.”

i think i’m going to start advertising free stuff on craigslist with my address on there, and when people show up i’m going to jump out from behind a tree and attack them with a fucking bat.

like this

synchronicitercel

almost bought another tercel yesterday, and right after helping dylan with his. crazy synchronicity. this one was an ’84 DLX with the 3.73:1 gear ratio that i like, manual steering, and no sunroof. it was in victoria but some other asshole got to it first. here are the pics from the ad

i’m bummed because I JUST FUCKING LOVE THESE CARS AND THIS ONE LOOKED SO GOOD–but i’m trying to soothe my disappointment by focusing on other things, like how the antenna appears damaged or modified (it should stick straight up) and the paint on the driver side rear door and rear quarter panel does not match, indicating those areas were damaged at some point. these are small details but may point to other larger issues. plus it’s a lowly DLX with the shitty seats and no tachometer.

and of course, i have no reason to go buying another car when the corolla is so fucking good to me. i really doubt any tercel is going to be able to match the mileage i get in the corolla, or be as reliable.

but that extra low gear…

the inclinometer (i have a spare one at home, waiting to be installed)…

that billy goat feel…

i wish i could stop caring so much about a chunk of metal.