july 2023: a fun wedding and road trip in the midst of a summer of dread – part 2

Ok, take two. Gonna try to recap our recent road trip without getting mired in nihilism this time. Please note I’m doing this as a diary for myself so it will likely be boring for you. Apologies.

Day 1
Left the house right on schedule yet got to the Duke Point ferry terminal with literally zero time to spare — we had made a reservation but you have to arrive at least 30 minutes prior to the sailing or else BC Ferries doesn’t honour it, the snakes. We had given ourselves an extra 15 minutes to get there but traffic in Duncan was so fucked that it ate up the entire 15 minutes. Ferry ride was fine, ate some tasty trash White Spot for lunch.

Driving in the lower mainland sucked, traffic was terrible. Stopped at a gas station to buy double bass drum pedals from a guy through FB marketplace and what do you know, he was nice and normal and the pedals are great. Plus the gas station had a Triple O’s so we got milkshakes as per our road trip tradition. That’s right, two White Spot hits in one day. Legit. Got to Merritt and it was hot and smoky from the wildfires. Merritt is a cool, sad little town though. I want to spend more time there in the future. We saw a gross-looking pub we wanted to hit so bad. Next time. Got to Glimpse Lake and set up our travel trailer at the airbnb everyone else seemed to be staying at, then went to the Baker’s cabin and spent the evening with everyone there. I had some lovely conversations with Kyla and Cecia about distinctly non-festive topics. I just can’t stop. Oh well, they couldn’t either so I was in good company.

Day 2
Slept well. Got up and got ready for the wedding. Was told by people that in my semi-formal attire, I looked like a school principal or music teacher. Not the best compliments I’ve received but it could be far worse so I was ok with those. It was smoky as sin out and I thought about how grim it is for a young couple to be getting married in a sea of wildfire smoke. Feels so hopeless, like, why bother? The world is burning anyway. I kept these thoughts to myself. Luckily for the couple, the smoke cleared for the wedding ceremony. The ceremony itself was nice, not too long. Cecia rapidly dissolved into a sobbing mess and used her hat as a container for all her snotty, teary tissues. It was hilarious and wonderful. After the ceremony Jenn and I drove the truck and trailer to Kamloops for the reception. It was a pretty drive. Got to Kamloops and it was also hot and smoky. Parked at a very sad, trashy campground. Dropped the trailer there in an open field and headed to the venue. The reception was utterly fantastic, I loved it from start to finish. I took 200 mg of caffeine just before it to keep myself ‘up,’ that may have impacted my feelings on it, but anyway. We sat at a table with Kyla, Russ, Liam, Chantelle, and Scott Baldry. Kyla and I critiqued everything, Jenn disapproved but I enjoyed having a Statler to my Waldorf.

The food was fine. Some speeches were good, some were awful, but they didn’t last terribly long so that was good. Dancing started and the crowd was tepid for several songs until the mother and sisters of the bride emerged dressed as an ABBA tribute group and put on a splendid little performance and got everyone pumped up. Lots more disco followed so of course I danced. Gradually the music shifted to 90’s hip hop/R&B stuff I don’t know so I took some breathers toward the end of the night but there was still tons of great tunes. I requested Party in the USA for Steve Walter because he loves that song, it was funny. I probably danced to 85% of the music that night — shit, maybe from about 8 pm till midnight? Wow, that’s nuts. Honourable mentions: Kyla and Cecia were bonkers dancers, loved them. Sean and Joel were pumped about a dark disco song I’d never heard called Walk the Night or something, and I loved it. It had such a menacing vibe despite being so dance-able. I got to know Rory’s fiancee, Mort, a bit better and decided I really like her, and want her and Kate to meet because they’re like long lost sisters and I bet they will get along smashingly. Had some great chats with Scott Baldry and was wow’d by how unassumingly astute he is. I never knew him well, and haven’t spent much time with him in the last decade and a half. Always liked him but just didn’t realize how smart he is. I spent a lot of time fucking with Russ throughout the night, grabbing his ass and whatnot. We finally left the wedding around midnight and went back to our trash open field campground where I proceeded to barely sleep a wink. No idea why.

Day 3
Got up early because I was just laying there not sleeping, and we were in full sun and hot as fuck by 6 am. Jenn was very hungover. Packed up and went for breakfast at a perfect spot, a filthy little diner just down the road. Surly 60-something year old waitress who looked like a character in a John Waters film due to her wildly loud and outdated style. Tasty food, very affordable. Jenn dragged me to the horse store next door afterward. Started driving north, saw some cute tiny towns. Little Fort and Lone Butte were my faves, they were so quaint. Bought some amazing baked goods at a general store in Bridge Lake. Tried swimming at Lac des Roches but Jenn sunk up to her knees in muck (much to my delight) so we abandoned that and continued on. The drive north on highway 97 wasn’t very interesting, just lots of small, broke ass towns that weren’t interesting. Lots of gross-looking houses and trailers and people. Started noticing lots of wildfire fighters everywhere. Stopped for ice cream and had a look around a historic site at 108 Mile. Got to Quesnel, headed East to Wells. Saw an old cemetery and abandoned buildings in the remnants of Stanley. Came across a young tree planter who had crashed her car by falling asleep at the wheel and driving down a steep bank. She was fine and her tree planter pal came and picked her up. Continued on, saw either a small wolf or a big coyote. Got to Wells and was wow’d by it. Such a colourful little town in the middle of nowhere. We got a campsite and rode our bikes around town all evening, got ice cream there too. Lots of neat buildings and art pieces everywhere. I woke up in the middle of the night and heard wolves howling.

Day 4
Got up early and headed to Barkerville. We had heard lots of good things about the actors there but we didn’t see any. The workers in the cafes and gift shops were dressed old time-y but they weren’t in character or anything. I had mixed feelings about this because I had wanted to see actors hamming it up but was also worried it would be too embarrassing for me to take. We enjoyed checking the place out anyway, lots of interesting history there. Saw a big black bear on our hike back from the courthouse in Richfield or whatever it’s called. Jenn got a lesson in gold panning and got to try it, that was the highlight for both of us there. Left there and headed south to Big Lake Ranch to visit me mommy at her new place. Lots more wildfire fighters along the way. It was a great visit with mom, she showed us around her farm, we played with her dogs, caught up lots, and she made a fantastic meal.

Day 5
Had a leisurely breakfast with mom then started the long drive home. It was hot as hell. Smoky. Firefighters. We stopped for thrift shopping and lunch in Lac le Hache. A woman in the restaurant kept clearing her throat violently every two minutes or so. It was so fucking loud it hurt my ears each time. She was sitting with two men but they didn’t seem to notice or care, and I was baffled. A TV was on, the news was talking lots about “hottest week in history of the planet last week, next week even hotter, Canada wildfires out of control, etc.” The news widget on my phone’s home screen kept saying that stuff too, and it really started to get to me. I have a hard enough time being miserable and depressed as it is, and being confronted this whole trip with smoke, incredible heat, wildfire fighters, possible highway closures, and now non-stop news about these things bothered me a lot. So I removed the news headlines thing from my phone, and have been reading the news less since then. I know the situation is bad and getting worse, and I don’t believe it’s going to stop, so it’s best for me to not dwell on it any more than I already do. The food at the restaurant was great though.

Stopped in Clinton because Jenn saw some vintage/junk stores but all of them were overpriced tourist traps. Got down to the Fraser Canyon and holy hell, it was hot as tits throughout there. The A/C in the truck couldn’t keep up with it so we just had to drive with the windows open. Stopped for ice cream in Boston Bar and it was a terrifically sad place. We had wanted to hit Hell’s Gate but were too late, bummed about that. We stopped and hiked down to the old Alexandra Bridge and that was amazing, one of the highlights of the trip for me. It’s such a relic of a bygone era, a massive piece of work that is now largely forgotten. I’ve been obsessed lately with impermanence, how things we unconsciously think will last forever, don’t. And when future generations see the remnants of these old things, they laugh at the past because it seems so old fashioned, out of touch, out of date, silly in comparison to newer technologies and whatnot. Nothing lasts. All the dried up towns in the canyon were a good example of this: the canyon had once been the only highway in the area, and the towns had thrived because of all the traffic. Then the Coquihalla highway was built and all the canyon towns died. I used to like seeing them but on this trip it made me sad, probably because I was already feeling kind of fucked and hopeless. Got to Yale, found a campground, biked down to the river for a swim before dinner. Janna called Jenn and said she could see the northern lights so we looked for those but couldn’t see them.

Day 6
Got up early and made tracks for the Tsawwassen ferry terminal. We had made a reservation for 11:00 am, expecting traffic to be piss, but it actually wasn’t too bad. Got to the terminal at 9, asked if we could change our reservation and get on the 10, and they said yup so that was great. AND THEN I GOT BUBBLE TEA. I had waited the whole trip for this moment — the last time I was there I found a vendor selling bubble tea at the little market there. I wasn’t sure if they would be open this early but they were! I got a mocha one and it was very good. I can’t believe how much better bubble tea makes my ferry experience. And that was pretty much it. Ferry ride was fine, we hid in the trailer and read (I was reading The Road, probably a terrible idea), the drive from Swartz Bay home was good, minimal traffic.

july 2023: a fun wedding and road trip in the midst of a summer of dread – part 1

We just returned from a road trip to the interior of BC. The first reason for the trip was a wedding, second reason was to visit my mom and see her new place, third reason was to make a vacation out of it and do some road tripping like we hadn’t done in years. It was a great trip: the wedding was a ton of fun, the visit with my mom was really nice, and the road tripping was just like our classic adventures. But there was a hitch: it was hot as hell, and BC was (and still is, and likely will be for several months) largely on fire so there was lots of smoke everywhere we went, and that really gave the trip a tense, scary, “you’re having fun right now but the chaos is on your doorstep” feeling. And not just in a “your trip might be impacted by the wildfires” way. It was bigger, heavier, more ominous than that.

When Stella died recently, I found myself using the word ‘sad’ to describe how I felt about it. It’s such a simple, basic, kind of dumb word, but it was exactly how I felt — I wasn’t crushed or broken, and I wasn’t “oh well, life goes on.” I was sad. Similarly, I find ‘scary’ is a dumb word but I think it really applies to these summers of the last 10 years. The droughts, heat, and fires just keep getting worse and worse, and while life is still able to mostly go on for now, I get scared thinking about the chaos that is likely just around the corner. I’m beyond worried but not panicking, and I feel like ‘scared’ is somewhere in the middle there, so it works: I’m scared of summer.

I know this isn’t new. I remember some previous posts I’ve made about my summer dread, and the same factors were at play. But summer keeps getting worse and still, no one is doing shit. We’re just continuing to live our normal lives as if this will sort itself out. We are the frog in the pot of water that is starting to boil.

Yesterday Jenn and I were talking about this, and about the illusion we have that things are being done to prevent further environmental damage. We’re all encouraged to recycle properly and take shorter showers in the summer, maybe buy an electric car if you can afford it. But guess what, those tiny acts don’t amount to shit. Never mind that most people don’t care and don’t do that stuff anyway. I think the main reason governments encourage people to do that stuff is to placate the hippies, to make them feel like real steps are being taken — because if you’re doing it yourself, you feel involved, you see the efforts firsthand, you feel good about doing your part. But that’s as far as your tiny efforts go: those same governments are still bowing to rich corporations and signing off on drilling for more oil, fracking for more gas, building more pipelines. Airplanes are still flying constantly, puking forth immense amounts of pollution. Mining companies spill millions of cubic meters of toxic waste into lakes that are drinking water for the province and important fish breeding grounds, and the companies blame a few employees who are then fined one year of wages each, and then work resumes like normal.

So go ahead and keep sorting your glass and tins and paper products. Do what you need to feel like you are doing what you can, but know that this situation is like being passengers on a bus driven by governments and big corporations. They’re steering it straight for a cliff, and most of the passengers are too busy staring at their phones to notice or care, and those who do care are encouraged by the driver to stick their hands out the window to try to slow the bus down. Your hands aren’t doing shit but it’s keeping you busy, and that’s what they really want.

Well, that’s not the post I wanted to write. I wanted to do a little road trip diary that mentioned all the fun stuff we did AND the scary wildfire stuff that kept reminding us of how bad the situation is. I wanted to capture the opposing feelings, the wild pendulum swings between the fun and scary. But I guess I’ve been feeling so bad that I needed to get this out first. I’ll try again later.